In this episode, we welcome Matt from Springfield, MO, who is dating another hypnotist. Matt is recently divorced with 3 teenage boys, one of which he's a foster parent for. Diagnosed with ADHD two and a half years ago, Matt has found a way to turn his ADHD into a super power. He keeps himself busy as a self-employed graphic designer, entertainer, ventriloquist, and puppeteer. He's a Southern Gospel / bluegrass music lover which may seem conservative to some, yet he's also polyamorous (many loves). As Matt explains his life to Traci, she begins to uncover that he was subjected to years of "transactional love" between his parents and ex-wife, a subtle form of manipulation used to get him to behave in a certain way. Everything he did came with "what will other people think about you?" This constant pressure of worrying about what others think can create adults who are severe people pleasers. It's easier to just do what others want them to do rather than risk losing the love and acceptance they crave. Matt has become a supreme people pleaser, and now this road is affecting him intimately. In Part 1, The Hilarious Hypnotist begins to weave through years of therapy and help Matt explore his fears of rejection.

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KEY POINTS:

• Matt begins sharing where he's at now in his life, dating a hypnotherapist who referred him to Traci.
• Matt talks about the positive aspects of his ADHD, and how he's embraced it as a super power.
• Matt is recently divorced, a father of 3 teenagers, and a self-employed graphic designer with many other talents. He loves dad jokes, puns, and one-liners.
• Matt discusses his transitional love with his parents and hints at a similar relationship with his ex-wife.
• Matt begins to cut the strings to his transaction love, keeping the best of his parents and getting rid of the ties that keep him bound to pleasing others.

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QUOTABLES:

“I know that because of my fear rejection, it also is a great motivator to be the better me. And I don't want to be that person that controls other people to be that jerk, right.”

“I'm going to let go of the guilt. I'm gonna let it go. I'm gonna let go of that transaction. That transaction is closed."

"When you keep giving me generalities, that's your ADHD saying, "Fuck this shit, I don't want to deal with it." But we're going to deal with it, okay? Because this is how you fix your shit."

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PRODUCTS / RESOURCES:

To learn more about Wings Hypnosis and book a session with her, visit wingshypnosis.com OR follow Traci on:

IG | @wingshypnosis - instagram.com/wingshypnosis/

YT | youtube.com/channel/UCXL-XQBxmgLL_NdYa_qN0zA

IG | @tracikanaan - instagram.com/tracikanaan/

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Get your own copy of "Hey" And Other Scintillating Mating Calls from the Online Dating World - audible.com/author/Traci-Kanaan/B0786F5GF4