**PLEASE NOTE in this episode explicit language is used, please listen at your own risk**

In part 1 of this two part series, Derek is joined by Ts Madison to discuss her journey as a Trans. She starts by thanking Derek for her mainstream growth. She wants people to understand first that all she is going to say here is her own perspective and experience. She is only one of the voices and is not speaking for the entire community.

Ts Madison opens up about when she was young she did not know what she was dealing with because she was raised in the church. For a long time she thought it was a demon because she was taught that it’s a demon and it’s evil.  It was a mental and spiritual struggle for a long time.

She always felt that she’s two spirited, man and woman. She just always wanted to look more like how she felt on the inside. The first person that she saw as a slight representation of her was Ru Paul but when she first really knew what she was, was when she watched "The Crying Game."

Some people still want to be stupid and be resistant to someone else’s identity because they don’t understand it.

She loves women but she never wanted to be a woman. She’s just knew she wanted to be somewhere in the middle. She walked away from her family because she’s more important than anything else. She’s not going to get any answer from her family, they already condemned her. Her goal was to get away so she could uncover who she truly was. Ts Madison reminds us you have to be willing to get lost to find yourself.

She had a point in her life where she thought of sexual reassignment surgery because there was no guidance. However, she decided that she did not need it. She feel like her genitalia has kept her grounded with God.

Transwomen make mistakes when you start looking at other transwomen and start going overboard. Sometimes when we say that our self-esteem is there, it isn’t there. She thought of having more surgery but she looked at the mirror and told herself to change her focus.

The job market has always been discriminatory against things they don’t understand. She’s always been prone to working and used to look down on sex workers but she learned a valuable lesson when she started losing her jobs and sex work was her only bread and butter.

She got sick of silicone poisoning because she was so determined to keep her man.

When Ts Madison moved to Atlanta, she was determined because she had nothing then. She was given a camera and got some help building a website and thats when her business was born as her videos started becoming viral and a 6 second video that she never thought would change her life.

She’s now keeping her clothes on and it’s because of the kids. She is now hustling in a different way. She wants everyone listening to understand you might be putting seeds in the ground 5 years back and that tree might not sprout until 5 years later, it may be 10, 15, 25 yrs but when that tree does pop up, it’s going to be fruitful.

She loves herself 100% and encourages each one of us to have the willingness to do the same.

Follow more of Ts Madison on Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/therealtsmadison/

Watch this interview LIVE on Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LARu44EpUkM